Why Saying Yes to Your Children is So Important

How you perceive things and how your child perceives things are so very different. Your child really is doing their best – even when their behaviour is unwanted, they are trying their best to make their world right.

Take a step back and consider things from their point of view. How would you feel in that situation?

Here are some examples of situations many parents find challenging. Notice how you’d respond if your best friend or partner did the same:

• Forgets to do something you’ve asked even though you’ve asked a few times.

• Drops the milk bottle out of the fridge which smashes and creates a huge mess.

• Can’t get to sleep or wakes up really early.

• Wants to use their time differently to you and the plans you’ve made.

• Has a favourite cup/mug that they love to use.

• Asks nicely for something but doesn’t actually say please.

Our desire to control and manage our children’s behaviour is often so strong and it is a journey of lots of small steps to move beyond it. It is possible though because I have done it and I was one of the biggest control freaks going when it comes to parenting!

Part of the process of Yes Parenting is responding to our children without punishment. When we really see punishment for what it is, even ‘light’ punishment, and how it relies on fear to create change, we can’t help but find a different way. That different way starts with us not with our children.